“I’m tired, Trey”, Santana said. You could see the despair on her face.
“But baby”, Trey started.
“No but baby nothing. I’m tired. It’s done. I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”
“So that’s it, huh? You can’t even ask me how I feel about it?”
The waitress walked to their table. “Here’s the check guys. It’s been my pleasure serving you two tonight.”
“Thanks, Tiffany”, Santana said. Trey and Santana had been going to The Sweet Room since their engagement, but tonight’s occasion wasn’t so sweet. They got up from the table and walked to the car. As Trey tried not to express his anger, Santana could sense the tension.
“What is it, Trey?”
“Say it before I change my mind!”
“Babe are you sure about this? I just don’t want you to regret this.”
“Regret trying to save my life?”
“That’s not what I mean and you know it.”
“Well what do you mean, Trey?”
“I’m just saying aren’t you going to miss them?” He said as he glanced at her chest.
“Of course I am but I gotta do it. You heard Dr. Roberts.”
“I know. I know.”
The pair woke up bright and early and headed to see Dr. Roberts.
“It’s time, Trey.” Dr. Roberts told him. He kissed Santana’s forehead as they wheeled her to the operating room. While wheeling her, Trey could hear Santana humming, “Loving You” by Minnie Riperton, a song she frequently sang to Trey. It put him at ease, listening to her voice. He knew everything would be ok. As he paced back and forth in the lobby, he noticed it was taking a bit longer than he was told, but he tried not to worry That was until he saw Dr. Roberts face. It was blank, almost like he wasn’t there. He knew it wasn’t good news.
The room was silent. Time stood still. This wasn’t happening.
“But the cancer wasn’t as aggressive as you all thought it would be? That’s what she told me.”
“Trey, I believe Santana was trying to protect you. She didn’t want you to know how sick she really was.”
“I just don’t understand why would she want to protect me?”
“She knew this double mastectomy procedure was a big risk, but she had to try for you. She told me to tell you, if she didn’t make it, for you to check her jewelry box. She left something for you.”
Trey couldn’t bare the thought of seeing Santana lying on a cold slab. Not yet, not right now. He rushed home to find out what Santana had left for him.
My dearest Trey,
Please don’t be upset with me but I couldn’t bare to let you live this life. You didn’t ask to fall for the sick girl. You deserve more than constant hospital visits and chemo treatments. I wanted to give you more, but God chose otherwise. You brought color into my life. So much color. It was so dark and depressing before you. You made me have more to live for. I appreciate that. I thank you for loving me the way I needed to be loved. Know I’ll be in heaven painting whimsical staircases, smiling bright and loving you from afar. Your love was simple, like a walk in the park. It’s gonna always be easy because you’re beautiful. I love you, Trey so love me enough to be ok with God’s plan and know that I’m not tired anymore.
Trey broke down. As he pulled himself together he thought about Santana’s words and decided to go back to the hospital to see her. As he drove, “Loving You” played on the radio and he smiled as he hummed the song for the rest of he ride.